This is Life: Everyday is a new version of ME

Just when I thought I’d hit peak grandma status, my doctor suggested I get a medical alert necklace. Yup, the kind you push for help. "I've fallen and I can't get up." This would really complete my fabulous look with this giant back brace and my trusty walker. I totally understand the worry since I’m home alone a lot these days, but seriously, I’d rather chill on the floor until someone shows up to assist my fat ass than sport a beeper around my neck!

My back brace and walker…trendy as hell! 🤣

I finally got the paperwork sorted for my handicap plaque from the doctor. It feels great to be able to park right by the entrance for my appointments, making it way easier with my walker. Who knew this would be what gets me excited these days?!

My new steps to get in but sadly I’m still on the couch as I’m not ready for this just yet!

This week has been all about visiting different doctors, plus I've got physical therapy and a nurse coming to my place. I don’t even have to step outside! But honestly, I’m starting to feel like a bit of a recluse. Going out gives me anxiety; I wear a mask, but that hasn’t stopped me from getting sick before! And the thought of falling again and messing up my spine or breaking another bone? Ugh, I’m already a hot mess as it is. At this rate, I might as well just move into the hospital! 🥴🥴

On a different note, if you know me at all, you’re probably aware that my culinary skills are about as advanced as a toddler’s. My idea of cooking usually involves pouring cereal into a bowl or hitting up Uber Eats like it’s my second job. Whenever I decide to channel my inner chef and actually use the stove, my husband is always on standby with a backup meal, just in case my “gourmet” creation turns into a disaster. I can tell how it’s going by the look on his face after the first bite—it's a mix of horror and pity, followed by a classic, “Good effort, Lex.” So, now that I’m stuck at home (like I’m on a jury for a soap opera murder case), I think it’s the perfect time to dive into YouTube and level up my cooking game. I’m starting from square one, I’m talking about mastering the art of chopping without losing a finger (seriously, I’ve almost lost a finger several times).

I did prep this but all pre made from Whole Foods cold bar…. Does that count?!

Being home for the after-school chaos with the kids has been a wild ride. Some days are filled with giggles and joy, while others feel like I’m starring in a horror movie where the kids are the monsters draining my last ounce of energy! The mood is set the moment they walk through the door, especially my teenager. She either comes in like a beast or a ball of sunshine, depending on the social drama at school. I’m trying to zip it and let her “express” herself without prying like a detective—let me tell you, that’s a real test of patience! At first, it felt like I was conducting a psychological experiment every day, but slowly we’re finding our groove. If you have any tips for managing the after-school madness, I’m all ears!

My handsome dude taking some pics for his new modeling agency in NYC 🥰

Life right now feels like I'm stuck on a merry-go-round that just won't quit spinning! Every time it stops, I find myself in a different seat—sometimes I’m the unicorn, sometimes the horse, and occasionally the far ass woman wondering how I got here. Sarcoidosis is the one pulling the strings, and it’s not the best ride operator! Waking up each day is like being invited to a surprise party where the theme is “What’s Going to Hurt Today?” The scariest part is the unknown. I see others in support groups living their own versions of this wild ride, and it’s a mixed bag of inspiration and “Oh no, not that!” This disease is a real party crasher, messing with every part of my body and mind. But fear not! I’m on a mission to find the right mix of meds that will finally let me take the wheel. I’m also pushing for more research so that future riders don’t have to be guinea pigs in this medical circus.

Put some cover up on for the dr appointment, most make up I’ve worn in months.

A huge shoutout to my friends and family for being my cheerleaders! Your support and kind words are like the confetti that keeps me going. My village is the secret sauce behind my determination to keep marching forward, one dizzying spin at a time!